


Lol, nice one. Wait, you're being serious?

by purplenerd777



Series: Stories from Starfinder [3]
Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: F/M, Happy Ending, Not Canon Compliant, Past Character Death, anxiety attack, other characters make an appearence but not long enough to actually make a tag for them, spoilers for kotet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 10:52:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10015922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplenerd777/pseuds/purplenerd777
Summary: Theron was right, with all potential rulers of Zakuul gone, someone had to take the position. But why was everyone looking at Sillani? She was just a smuggler who happened to somehow be Commander of the Alliance.Basically what I wish had happened at the end of KOTET.





	

Sillani was in the cantina staring at the overturned tables her people (when did that come to encompass an entire resistance instead of six life forms living in an XS- freighter together?) had used to form a temporary barricade while she and Vaylin duelled outside over the body of Torian. She couldn't blame any of them, wouldn't have demanded any of them to come out and join that force-forsaken fight with them.  
  
She stepped over some used med pacs and adrenals making her way behind the bar, which had clearly been turned into a temporary infirmary to protect the injured. Ignoring most of the damage she found herself a bottle of Correlian red and downed a quarter of the bottle without pausing for a breath.  
  
She hadn't known Torian for too long. But he had been a good shot and the stories of his wife, the champion of Mandalore, he told when he was drunk enough to be put in a wistful mood had always prompted her to share her own.  
  
"I thought I would find you here." Lana called softly as the former sith descended down the stairs into the dimly lit cantina. Sillani chased her previous drink with some more, enjoying the flat, bitter taste the drink provided. It didn't burn the way a 10 year old bottle from Ord Mantell would, but she had a burning sensation in her gut, and she didn't need a bottle of liquor to help with that.  
  
"Old habits die hard." Sillani replied finally, placing the bottle down on the countertop with a dull thud.  
  
"We're having a meeting in the War Room to plan the next phase of the attack." Lana said, moving  over to the bar and taking a swig of the bottle which Sillani was drinking out of. "Counterattack" the sith corrected herself.

  
"I was on my way down." Sillani said, as she made her way towards the exit, her right hand following not more than a step behind.  
  
When the lift stopped at the bottom level, it was no surprise that she was stepping into another warzone.   
  
"There's a power vacuum on Zakuul, it needs to be filled." Theron pointed out, his shoulder being addressed by Sana-Rae.  
  
"Yeah, you're right, would hate to have another homicidal maniac on the throne." Vette snarked, making a pointed look at Arcann, as she tended to Tee-seven.  
  
"I most certainly am not trying to take the throne, you do not have to worry about that." Arcann grumbled, slashing his hand forcefully through the air (Sillani chuckled at her own thought before attempting a more serious look).  
  
"Oh really why else would you come back?" Koth retaliated. "We all know there's only one person who could be put on the throne, and she already has approval from the one good ruler Zakuul ever had. I-"  
  
"Please do share who this obvious choice is Koth." Sillani, not quite ordered, but as close as she got. "If we're putting in suggestions my vote is for Kaliyo, she's got a certain: just want to watch the galaxy burn attitude that is missing from a lot of leaders."  
  
"Kriff yeah, Commander." Kaylilo called from her spot by the strategic terminals.  
  
"Commander, please take this seriously." Lana sighed, rubbing at her temple.  
  
"I'm apparently taking this as serious as the ship stealer-"  
  
"Hey!"  
  
"Don't worry she still hasn't given me any slack for faking being a Jedi, even though I actually am one now. “Guss comforted Koth and Bowdaar let out a roar in agreement.  
  
"Commander, I'm pretty sure Koth was taking this seriously." Aric interjected, making his way towards her, stopping in front of her in perfect parade rest.  
  
Sillani looked around the faces in the war room, and noticed that they all shared the same levity as the Cathar standing in front of her.   
  
And let out a bark of laughter that probably wasn't appropriate after an invasion on the only planet she ever called home.  
  
"Kriff. I'm sorry. I admit I've gotten used to you guys calling me Commander. Ha. But can you imagine a dirty smuggler being called empress?" She managed to say between clutching her gut and laughing.  
  
"You haven't been a dirty smuggler in a long time, Commander." Viz called to her from... somewhere. Kriff she was having a hard time keeping track of everyone. _Like you lost track of Torian and Vette_.   
  
When she finally managed to straighten herself up, she was surprised to see that Guss and Bowdaar hadn't broken down like she had.  
  
"Stars, you're all serious."  
  
"Of course we are Commander." Lana said, a small crease forming in between her eyebrows.   
  
"You're the best person for the job." Theron said, pushing himself off the console he was leaning on and interrupting the healing being done on his injuries. "You've brought people together from both sides of the galaxy. People from Zakuul will have no trouble following you."  
  
"I don't want to be a leader like that!" Sillani shouted, immediately aware of how childish she sounded, but unrepentant.   
  
"With all due respect, Commander, it's not about what you want. It's what's strategically for the best. People follow you. It's as simple as that." Aric said in his military style, she caught Aygo nodding out of the corner of her eye.  
  
It felt like the room was closing in on her. She could feel faintly through the force, what little she could feel of it, the anxieties coming off her people in waves. She could still feel the scar in the force from where Torian had been abruptly taken out. She didn't even know the Mandalorian burial ritual. _Should have talked to Akaavi when you had the chance.  
_  
All the cloying pressure. She just wanted to be a captain. Fly a ship. Keep her people safe. That's all she- Her hand drifted towards her blaster. Not Flashy, Flashy had been gone when Lana came to rescue her. She shifted her weight to the ball of her foot. Ready to run. Ready to do what she does best.  
  
Lana laid a hand on her shoulder, and gave her a reassuring squeeze. Sillani could feel herself being slowly walled off from the force. She heaved in a gasp of air.  
  
Closed her eyes. Took a deep breath. Held it. Thought of the ways she could fix a hyperdrive malfunction. Exhaled.  
  
"Well Jorgan. I've never been one for what was strategically best." Sillani said in her best Pazaak card voice. Calm. Cool. In control. "Everyone's dismissed 'cept for Lana, Tor- Theron, and Arcann."  
  
There was about to be another uproar, but she could feel the stern gaze Lana sent the rest of the crew's- _not crew-_ way. "You heard the Commander, I'm sure there are things you all should be attending."  
  
Everyone made the war room as clear as possible, giving the four of them plenty of room to appear as if they had privacy, despite some still gathered around various maps and consoles.   
  
Before heading off Bowdaar diverted his way over to her. " _I have heard what befell the Mandalorian. He died a warrior's death. I had spoken to Akaavi of this, like my people, it is an honourable death_ "  
  
She didn't bother to correct him that Torian didn't have time to raise his weapon. That his neck was snapped by a petulant child while he was kneeling defenceless on the floor. "Yeah big guy." The 7ft Wookiee affectionately cuffed her head before making his way over to where Viz was running through something with some pilots.   
  
"Outlander, your people were not wrong. The people of Zakuul would follow you." Arcann stated after a brief moment.  
  
"I've had to learn a long time ago that people follow me for some bizarre reason." Sillani sighed, rubbing at her eyes, then stretching her scar as she dropped her hand. "That's not why I'm rejecting this Hoth forsaken idea though."  
  
"Then what's the problem?" Theron asked, while the cracks of his Pazaak face chipped away in frustration.  
  
"I said it before. I said it when I became Commander of the Alliance and I said it when I became an official privateer of the Republic: I don't want this. I want a ship beneath my feet and that ship to be in a hyper lane headed for some new adventure." She leaned up against a panel behind her, crossing her arms. To her right she saw Lana slightly tip her head in agreement.  
  
"Commander this is bigger than you. This is bigger than all of us!" Theron near shouted. He had never lost his temper at her before, and she bristled beneath it.  
  
"Why not just do what you do," He was part of the SIS, he was more a member of the Republic than she ever was, "and dismantle the government and have the people of Zakuul become a part of the Republic?"   
  
Lana chuckled slightly.  
  
"Or the empire. I don't care at this point." She turned to Arcann, "How would the people of Zakuul respond to that?"  
  
"The people of Zakuul think both factions are inferior to them and the Eternal Empire." Arcann responded blandly. Sillani flinched slightly in return.  
  
"Right well then choose someone else for all I care. If you want, keep using me as a propaganda piece to keep the Alliance together. But I am not an empress. I do not scheme like Saresh. I do not crave power like the Sith. Sorry Lana."  
  
"No. You're not wrong." Lana paused, pursing her lips. "But besides not wanting to, what other reason do you have to not agree to this. Even for a short time until we find someone who we can trust to take over the role?"  
  
Sillani had to choke back a growl of frustration. "Does there need to be another reason?" She received dry looks from the two oldest advisors, and even Arcann seemed nonplussed. "Ok. If hard pressed, I can admit I make a good leader in times of duress. Charging into battle? Leading troops? I guess I've proven I can do that. But leading a population of people? All those logistics? Governing and what not? I can't do that. That's why I have advisors." She pointed at the two of them. "Kriff, Risha took over ordering supplies on the _Starfinder_ when she joined because I wasn't spending my credits wisely enough to sustain supplies for three life forms on a tiny freighter, let alone a whole planet, or empire, or whatever!"  Risha would know what to do. Risha would have made a great queen. _If she was here now I'd suggest her in a heartbeat._   
  
There were a few moments of silence, the three of them seemed to be digesting what she was saying then: "I'm not one to agree with Koth on destiny." Lana said slowly, cautiously. "But it could be that destiny, the force, whatever you want to call it, is guiding you into this. Maybe this is what you were meant to do."  
  
_I never thought the little Sith would agree with me._ Valkorion chuckled in the back of her mind, she caught his force presence pacing just outside of their circle.  
  
"And that's another thing!" She abruptly cried in response, straightening up. Theron giving her a questioning look, though Arcaan and Lana seemed to have a better grasp on the outburst. "Doesn't it bother you that Valkorion agrees? That this whole time Valkorion has been encouraging me to take the throne? This could be one of his long term schemes!" Sillani continued.  
  
The three others looked between them as if to come up with a counter argument. "Father's plans never were what they seemed." Arcann conceded.   
  
"Right, so here's what we do-" Sillani started, and she caught Valkorion glare at her in frustrated anger.   


* * *

  
  
The Eternal Throne was immediately dismantled. Sillani left a nice pile of rubble behind in its place. She and the rest of the leaders of the Alliance then told the people of Zakuul that they were free to decide how they were to proceed. Both the Knights and the Heralds willingly took the helm to directing their people to a better future. Senya and Koth both stayed behind on the planet. Senya taking over again as head of the Knights and Koth as the representative from the alliance.  
  
Sillani promised the people of Zakuul that they could remain independent from the two other factions of the galaxy and that the Alliance would be the buffer between Zakuul and the Republic and Empire.  
  
The Alliance still continued to exist with Odesseon as a neutral world. The Alliance continued to be a safe haven for those who wished to maintain peace in the galaxy and were unafraid to work with those with different methods to obtain it.  
  
Sillani remained head of the Alliance and continued to send her people to where they were needed most, providing aide and supplies to parts of the galaxy that were often overlooked in a continuous power struggle.  
  
Lana and other force users eventually found a way to rid Valkorion of her mind once and for all.  
  
One day, about a standard year after Zakuul's new government was set up, a small freighter dropped into Odesseon's atmo. Sillani was on some down time working on the _Starfinder_ with Bowdaar as a way to destress when Lana walked out to the field and greeted her, as she stood on top of her ship with greased hands and a growing welt from where she hit her head when Bowdaar got her attention that Lana was arriving.  
  
"Captain," Sillani was technically on her ship and Lana had never been one to break a promise, "You'll want to see this. There's been a diplomatic envoy sent by Dubrillion."   
  
The tool Sillani had been holding dropped out of her hand and nearly hit Bowdaar who was also too stunned to chide her for her lack of awareness.  
  
"Who-" She took a steadying breath jumping from the top of the ship and landing with a grace earned from years of battle and practice. "Have they gotten off yet?"  
  
She trailed after Lana to the landing hanger. "I came to get you as soon as we received a transmission informing us they were here on a diplomatic mission."  
  
Sillani's heart was beating a mile a minute, her tattoos tingled slightly, whether from tears or some weird reaction to the force she didn't stop to find out.   
  
When she skidded to a halt in front of the freighter next to Theron she had to remind herself to breathe as the pressure from the ship was released.  
  
Out of the shadows appeared a silhouette wearing a cape, with knee high boots. Reminiscent of any number of diplomats from any number of Republic worlds. But, once the steam cleared, Sillani could clearly make out the face of Risha Drayen, if she had slightly more stress lines than when she last saw her  
  
"You old Scoundrel." Sillani crowed, though she could feel her heart drop slightly to her gut, but she forced herself to move into greet her old friend, with a quick fake jab to the side before she pulled her into a hug.   
  
She could hear Bowdaar laughing in the background most likely at Lana and Theron's stunned faces if their force signatures were anything to go by.  
  
"Wow, never thought you would be the leader type." Risha quipped as she walked arm and arm down the ramp with Sillani.  
  
"I could say the same to you, what happened to not wanting to take the throne?" Sillani had to force herself not to turn back to the ship, to not hope that another person would descend out of the darkness. That her family would be finally reunited (Akaavi had returned shortly after Torian's remains were sent back to his clan.)  
  
Risha cracked a sly grin, looking around the hanger in a suspiciously nonchalant manner. "Things change. Captains go missing and we have to find some way to occupy our time."  
  
"We?" Sillani holds her breath this time, Risha was never one to say not exactly what she meant.  
  
"Miss me?" A gruff voice drawled.  
  
Sillani spun on her heel and there- There standing at the bottom of the ship's ramp not 10 feet away from her was her Farmboy. Without paying attention to the fact that the hanger had quickly filled with personnel to see what the commotion was, without paying attention to Lana's rare face splitting grin, or Theron's whoop of approval, she charged to her Farmboy and embraced him so hard, they both were sent into a tumble on the ramp. Diving in for a deep kiss, she came up for air when she decided that the cheering of her people were enough, she stepped up and helped the large man to his feet.  
  
Looking him over she smiled even more broadly and asked, "What took you so long?"  
  
"Had to find the right bottle of something to make it special." In his hand he raised a bottle of 10 year Mantellian Whiskey.  "Couldn't get absolute guarantee that it was bottled the exact year we met, but I figure its close enough."  
  
Sillani could feel her scar stretching with her wide smile and the tears of joy running down her tattoos as she said, "Of course. It's perfect.”  


**Author's Note:**

> So yeah, that's what I wish had happened at the end of KOTET. That was my one big complaint was that even if you spent all of KOTFE saying you didn't want to be emperor/empress they still forced it on you. Also I am so sad that Torian is gone.
> 
> In this piece I tried to write how an anxiety attack feels but let me know how I did? It was a different take on my normal writing style and I want to see if it worked. 
> 
> Also wow, was not expecting that sappy bit at the end happening when I started writing, but here we are. 
> 
> As always feel free to comment with anything, it really does encourage me to write.


End file.
